Blessing

Isaac and his wife and sons all understood that the blessing of a father upon his first-born son had tremendous power to cause that son and his family to prosper for generations into the future. This blessing was understood to be so powerful that Jacob, with the help of his mother, Rebecca, was willing to lie, cheat, and deceive in order to obtain the blessing of his father that rightfully should have belonged to his brother, Esau. 

As we read in Genesis 27, Jacob, pretending to be his brother, Esau, was able to convince his partially-blind father that he was indeed Esau, and thereby received from his father the blessing of the first-born. When Esau subsequently came to his father to receive his blessing and discovered that his brother, Jacob, had already received from their father an irrevocable blessing scripture records the following:

“And Esau said to his father, ‘Have you only one blessing, my father? Bless me – me also, O my father!’ And Esau lifted up his voice and wept” (Genesis 27:38). .. “So Esau hated Jacob because of the blessing with which his father blessed him, and Esau said in his heart, ‘The days of mourning for my father are at hand; then I will kill my brother Jacob’ (Genesis 27:41).

Why was Esau so angry and hurt over the paternal blessing being given to his brother instead of to him? He was devastated because he understood something that very few people understand in our modern times. Esau knew that a father holds in his hand a key to the future prosperity of his children. When a father uses the key of blessing in the lives of his children, he releases them to prosper. When we follow the life of Jacob through several generations, we observe that Jacob and his family multiplied in number; they became exceedingly wealthy; they remained healthy did not experience plagues and sickness; and they conquered their enemies and ruled in their land for many generations. Esau, on the other hand, did not prosper and did not become large in number, did not become wealthy, and was frequently conquered by enemies. 

I have observed this same phenomenon in many modern-day families. Children who were blessed by their parents tend to prosper in their adult lives, and children who were never blessed by their parents tend to languish and not prosper. Why is this? I believe it is because blessing is a custom established by God and meant to function in every family on earth. Blessing is God’s primary mechanism of imparting deep into the heart of a person His image (thoughts, feelings, and experience) of identity (Who am I?) and destiny (Why am I here?). This is of critical importance because vision for life, physical and emotional health, financial prosperity, and family relational dynamics are all directly linked to images of God, self, and others imprinted in the inner man (heart) of every person. “As a man thinks in his heart, so is he” (Proverbs 23:7). 

We have seen many people experience supernatural physical and emotional healing the moment they allowed God to remove a deep-seated false image in the heart and replace it with an impartation from God of His Truth. In most such cases, the inner false image had come during childhood through lack of blessing from parents or even the opposite, direct cursing by parents.

So what is blessing, and it’s opposite, cursing? I would define these words this way: Blessing is God’s mechanism of impartation of His image of identity and destiny to the hearts of people. Cursing is Satan’s mechanism of impartation of his image of identity and destiny to the hearts of people. In Hebrew, the word to bless is the word, Baruch. The literal meaning of this word is “to kneel before someone.” 

However, the primary spiritual connotation is “to empower to prosper.” So when you bless someone, you kneel before them in humility and literally empower that person to prosper. I don’t believe that this word, prosper, is only applied to finances. If you bless your son, you empower him to prosper in every area of his life; his spiritual life with God, his physical health, his emotional well-being, his marriage, his children, his finances, his career, and his ministry. To curse is to do the opposite. If you curse your son, you likewise cripple, disable, or dis-empower him from prospering in all of these same areas of life. 

In the Greek, the word to bless is the word Eulogia. The literal meaning of this word is “to speak well of.” Perhaps you have already picked up on the English word, eulogy, which comes from this same root. A eulogy, of course, also has the meaning “to speak well of someone,” but unfortunately is usually spoken at a funeral. Obviously, that which is spoken at a funeral will not empower the dead person to prosper. In order to empower one to prosper, a blessing must be spoken while the person is yet living and can receive the blessing. So to curse is to speak evil of someone, or to speak Satan’s vision or image into someone’s life, while to bless is to impart God’s vision and image into a person’s life.

God has given the Jewish people a wonderful tradition of weekly family blessing that is still practiced to this day by many families. I am speaking of the tradition of gathering the family once a week on Erev Shabbat (Friday evening) for a special meal together and a pronouncement of blessing. (With the busy schedule of most families, for many this would be a miracle in and of itself just to be able to have a meal together once a week.) Each week at this time, the Jewish father prays a blessing over his wife. He then pronounces a Hebrew blessing over each of his children. 

In many Jewish families, the father also proclaims vision and prosperity over his children, thus creating an expectation in the children of future success and prosperity. By so doing, such a father, whether he knows it or not, is imparting God’s image into the hearts and minds of his children. In many Jewish families in which this is practiced, the words of blessing, which the father is speaking over his children, are prophetic, and the children fulfill in adult life exactly what their father prophesied weekly. 

I have also observed that in some Christian families, the primary words children hear from their parents are words of correction and criticism. Sometimes the words that parents speak actually impart Satan’s vision and image rather than God’s. Most parents are blind to the power that their words and actions have to bless or curse the lives of their children. For example, a father may say to his 15-year-old daughter, “You’re not going out of the house in those clothes. Why, you look like a prostitute! If you keep dressing like that, and hanging around with your current friends you’ll probably be pregnant within a year.” Such words from parents are also prophetic and also have the potential for children to fulfill exactly what their parents have prophesied. In many such Christian families there are only words of correction and no regular weekly time of blessing, as there is in some Jewish homes. 

As I studied this topic of blessing and cursing in the Bible, I identified six (6) critical times in a child’s life in which blessing was meant to be received from God through parents, and a seventh time at which children were meant to bless their parents. I will briefly list here these seven times. They are: 1) Conception, 2) During the time in the womb, 3) At Birth, 4) In infancy, 5) At the time of puberty (Rite of passage), 6) At the time of marriage, 7) In older age. Growing up in the ancient Hebrew culture, it would have been almost impossible to miss out on being blessed at all seven of these critical times. The culture was structured such that both ceremonial and day-to-day blessing naturally happened in most families. This resulted in spiritual, emotional, physical, relational, and financial health for such families who practiced blessing. 

Unfortunately, for most modern-day families, such customs and traditions originally placed by God even in our culture have systematically been eliminated. As a result, most parents today would not even know when are the seven critical times of blessing, let alone how to bless their children at any of these times. Furthermore, since our most of own parents also did not have the knowledge or experience of blessing while growing up, they were neither able to provide us the experience of blessing at these seven critical times, nor raise us in a culture and lifestyle of blessing. As a consequence, it is very difficult for those of us who are now parents to give to our children something (blessing) we have never received ourselves. Many adult children are left with the same deep inner heart cry of Esau, “Bless me - me also, O my father.”

At this point, you may be asking, “What can I do now to receive the missed blessings personally, and how can I bless my children? How can I establish a culture of blessing in my family and now initiate a cycle of blessing for all future generations?” 

As a result of so many people asking exactly these questions, in 1988 God led my wife, Jan, and me to begin a ministry, which is designed to provide people with not only the knowledge, but primarily with the heart experience of receiving blessing missed from parents directly from God. Through this ministry, Family Foundations International (FFI), we have trained thousands of teams in over 40 countries around the world to lead people through a spiritual process resulting in a supernatural experience of blessing with the Father. For many people this is a life-changing experience, as deep-rooted false images and experiential lies are removed by the power of God and replaced deep within the heart by Truth. We are able to provide participants with this supernatural experience of blessing that most people missed out on in their own family, by leading them through a very specific process that God gave us in a weekend encounter we call BLESSING GENERATIONS, An Ancient Paths Experience (Jeremiah 6:16). 

I believe that the best way to initiate and establish a culture of blessing in your own family now would be to attend a Blessing Generations Experience personally. However, even before doing this, a few other simple things that you can immediately implement in your family are the following. 

1. Consider establishing a weekly practice of gathering your family for a meal together on Erev Shabbat, Friday evening. Before coming together, as parents ask God if there are any ways in which you have sinned against or wounded your children over the past week. Then at the table, before the meal, confess anything that God has shown you to each child personally, repent and ask forgiveness from that child. Make sure to make eye contact while doing so. After repentance, then spend a few minutes praying for and speaking a blessing personally over each of your children. 

2. Consider making a practice of praying blessing over each other as husband and wife daily. This is not a “prayer meeting.” I am talking about six minutes a day. I suggest the following way to pray for each other. Find a consistent time that works for you as a couple. Face each other and pray with your eyes open, looking into each other’s eyes. (Plan to convey blessing not only with words, but also with your eyes.) Spend one minute each in prayer on each of the following three topics: A) Repent of and ask forgiveness for anything God shows you regarding how you have wounded or sinned against your spouse in the last 24 hours; B) Pray a prayer thanking God for your wife/husband (qualities you appreciate about her/him); C) Pronounce blessing over your spouse and her/his day.

3. Consider planning and conducting a rite of passage blessing ceremony for any of your sons or daughters who have reached or passed the age of puberty.

Over the years, we have found that there is a very strong connection between blessing and physical and emotional health. Lack of blessing or sometimes cursing is frequently correlated with physical sickness and lack of emotional, relational and financial well being. We have observed that when people have received an impartation of blessing from God, The Father, many times they have immediately experienced physical and emotional healing. I believe the reason for this is found in 3 John 2, which states: “Beloved, I pray that you may prosper in all things and be in health just as your soul prospers.”

Blessing means to empower to prosper, and is God’s mechanism of imparting His image and vision into the soul of a person. So blessing causes the soul of a person to prosper, which according to the Bible results in health and prosperity in all areas of life. 

The following are just a few of the stories relating to supernatural physical, emotional, and relational healing we have seen occur through receiving blessing from the Father in an Ancient Paths Experience, and through the blessing of an earthly father and mother. In many of these cases healing has come after a person has repented of bitterness toward and forgiven a parent who had cursed him/her and then received the blessing of God, the Father. Whether or not you are able to attend one of our seminars, my prayer is that you will receive a supernatural understanding of the power of the blessing and will begin to enjoy similar fruit in your own life.

ENDOMETRIOSIS, SCOLIOSIS, AND CHRONIC NECK AND BACK PAIN HEALED

We received the following accounts from William and Ruby Su, the leaders of our ministry team in the Philippines. A young woman in her early twenties who attended an AP (Ancient Paths) Experience had suffered for many years with endometriosis, cysts in her ovaries, and had not had any menstrual periods for over three years. During the course of the process in the AP Experience, she forgave her father who had abused her in childhood, and received a powerful blessing from her Heavenly Father. Shortly after the AP weekend she found that her female reproductive organs had returned to normal, she began experiencing normal menstrual cycles, and after an exam and ultrasound, her OB/GYN doctor could no longer find any evidence of any ovarian cysts or symptoms of endometriosis.

At another AP Experience on a different island a 52-year old woman came who, as a child, had been unjustly beaten by a very stern father, and many times blamed and falsely accused for wrong things that she had not done. Now her elderly father had just come to live with her and her family. After forgiving her father and receiving the blessing from The Father, she was released from severe back pain with which she had suffered for many years and others in the group noticed that a significant curve in the base of her neck was instantly healed and became straight. 

COMPLETELY HEALED FROM SYMPTOMS OF A STROKE

Our Ancient Paths team from Cuiaba, Brazil shared with us the following account.  A young woman attending an AP Experience, shared that all of her adult life, she had struggled with a huge feeling of hatred towards her father, who had rejected, cursed and abandoned her as a little girl. She shared that this feeling of hatred was so strong that even after her father’s death she could not forgive him. This young woman had also recently suffered a stroke and her legs were paralyzed and twisted. 

After forgiving her father and receiving a revelation of and blessing from God as her Father, this woman reported that all the feelings of hatred and bitterness were supernaturally gone and that she would now like to forgive, and honor the memory of, her earthly father. As she did so, others in the group were shocked as her legs instantly became straight, returned to normal, and she was healed of all remaining symptoms of the stroke. They reported that she immediately shouted for joy and glorified the name of God. 

HEALED FROM INFERTILITY

I have found that in families, not only is the blessing of the father important, but the words and blessing (or lack thereof) from the mother is also very impacting in the life of her children. God also intended every child to receive His image and impartation from both a father and a mother. 

Emily, who attended an Ancient Paths Experience in Brazil had been married for 13 years and had all her life dreamed of becoming a mother. Shortly after her wedding Emily found that she was infertile, and over the course of the next 13 years tried without success every known type of medical treatment to become pregnant. 

During the course of the AP weekend, Emily asked the Lord to reveal to her anything that might be connected with her infertility. Within seconds she was reliving several experiences in childhood in which her mother had imparted Satan’s lie and image to her heart by saying emphatically, “You will never be a mother.” This lie had deeply taken root in Emily’s heart and her body had apparently cooperated to fulfill this prophetic curse from the mother. 

After forgiving her mother, and allowing the Lord to replace the lie in her heart with His truth regarding her identity as a mother, Emily felt much lighter than when she had come. Fifteen days later, Emily reported back to her Ancient Paths Experience leader that she was now pregnant and expecting her first child. God had physically healed her female organs when she forgave her mother for cursing her and received God’s blessing and truth in the depths of her heart. At the time of this writing, Emily has now given birth to two beautiful, healthy children, and is a wonderful, loving mother.

MARRIAGE HEALED THROUGH BLESSING OF THE FATHER

Pablo was deeply saddened as he received the news from his father that his mother, who had been separated from his father for nine months, was not willing to return to the marriage and was now seeking a divorce. As Pablo pondered what he might do or pray to help his parents, a very strange thought came to him. He had recently experienced a powerful change in the life of his twenty-one-year-old son, who had been quite directionless and indecisive. This son could not decide if he wanted to enroll in Bible School, University, or get a job. Consequently, he was doing nothing but sitting at home doing nothing. Pablo told me that when he looked into the eyes of his twenty-one-year-old son, he saw a scared little boy, who didn’t know what to do and was afraid to make a decision.

About that time, Pablo and his wife attended and Ancient Paths Experience, and realized that the probable reason that their son was directionless was that he had never been blessed by his father, and consequently was still spiritually, and emotionally tied to his mother as a little boy. These parents then arranged a blessing ceremony for their son which turned out to be life-changing for him. Pablo told me that immediately after the ceremony, when he looked into his son’s eyes, for the first time, he saw looking back at him a confident, twenty-one-year-old man, not a scared little boy. The spiritual and emotional umbilical cord had literally been cut with his mother, and shortly after that Pablo’s son enrolled in University and began to pursue a course of study toward a career into which he was certain God had called him.

Now upon receiving news of his parents’ impending divorce, the strange thought that now came to Pablo was the remembrance of recently looking into his sixty-four-year-old father’s eyes and seeing the same “scared little boy look” that he had seen in his twenty-one-year-old son before he had conducted the blessing ceremony for him.  He now realized that his father, Luis, had never been blessed by his father and was still, at age sixty-four, emotionally tied as a little boy to his mother. The reason that Luis had struggled in relationship with his wife all of their married life was that he had never emotionally “left father and mother” so he could properly “cleave to his wife. (“For this cause shall a man leave father and mother and cleave to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh” Genesis 2:24).

Armed with this understanding, Pablo placed a telephone call to his 87-year-old grandfather, who was still alive, living in the country of their family’s origin. Grandpa was quite shocked as Pablo tried to explain to him his request to come impart his blessing to his son, Luis, and release him to be a man in a Bar Barakah (Christian Bar Mitzvah) ceremony to be held on Luis’s 65th birthday. Grandpa exclaimed, “You want me to do what? My son is having his 65th birthday celebration. If he is not a man yet, he never will be.” However, Pablo was insistent and Grandpa finally agreed to come.

Upon arrival, Pablo was able to explain to his Grandpa the key of blessing that he held in his hand as a father, and that Luis was still emotionally bound to his mother as a little boy, with the cry of Esau, Bless me - me also, O my father, still in his heart at age 65. Grandpa still didn’t entirely understand, but did agree that he would attempt to pray over and bless his son Luis on his 65th birthday.

When the day of the ceremony arrived, after a time of worship to God, Grandpa and Luis sat opposite each other in two chairs. Grandpa first attempted to tell his son, “I love you,” but only got out the first couple of syllables and broke into tears. Luis immediately broke into tears as well, and all either man could do for the next ten minutes was sit and weep. When Grandpa tried again, to tell his son he loved him, they both broke into tears again. Finally the third time, Grandpa was able to tell his son he loved him and how proud he was of him. He told Luis that he was a huge success because all three of Luis’s children loved the Lord, had married godly spouses and all of Luis’s grandchildren were all born again and serving Yeshua. “What greater legacy could a man ever ask for than that?” 

Then Grandpa asked, “Son, do you remember when you were 15 years old?” As his father asked this question, Luis’s eyes squinted as a huge surge of emotional pain began to be released. Yes, Luis remembered when he was 15 years old. What no one else knew was that at that time, Luis and his father had engaged in a huge argument that even became physical. Luis’s father had become enraged at him that day, and had screamed at him horrible things, told him that he was worthless, and physically threw him out of the house. He told him he hated him and hoped he would never see this worthless son again. 

Luis, of course, had become equally angry, had said horrible things to his father and also told him he hated him and never would see him again. He left the house in rebellion at age 15 to begin his adult life. Obviously, this was not the blessing his heart was looking for to release him into his adult identity. Since that time, Luis and his father had reconciled their relationship, but had never spoken of this event. As his father now brought it up fifty years later, it immediately stirred to the surface fifty years of bitterness, hatred, resentment, and anger that had been in Luis’s heart since that day. Years ago, he had voiced the words, “I forgive my father,” but his heart had never released the pain and he had neither truly forgiven his father from his heart nor repented of the bitterness, dishonor, or rebellion that had been in his heart toward his father. 

Now fifty years later, as his father lanced the infectious wound in his son’s heart, a deep, deep anguished cry escaped from the heart of his son as he burst into profuse sobbing. Luis fell forward and buried his face in his father’s breast, his father also sobbing profusely.  When Grandpa’s sobs had subsided enough to speak, he then whispered to Luis, “Son, I’m so sorry. I was wrong that day. Please forgive me. I got angry, said things I didn’t mean, and cursed you rather than blessing you. Please forgive me. I love you!” These words only intensified the sobbing of the son. 

When Luis’s sobbing finally subsided, he sat up and looked his father in the eyes. His father returning the gaze then asked him directly, “Son, I love you. I was wrong. Will you forgive me for the words I said and the way I treated you growing up in general and specifically on that day when you left home?” Luis then responded, “Yes Papa, I forgive you. I love you. I also was wrong in my attitude of dishonor and rebellion and the words I spoke. Will you forgive me?” Grandpa responded, “Yes, of course. I love you son. And today, I pronounce over you the words I should have spoken fifty years ago. Son, I’m proud of you. You are not a foolish little boy. You are a man. Today I bless you. I cut you lose emotionally and spiritually from your mother, and I give you my blessing and release you into your adult identity as a man. Go and be and do all God has called you to. ”

Pablo then related that something supernatural had happened in the heart of his father, Luis, through the blessing of his father. Immediately after this experience and ceremony of blessing, Pablo told me that later that day, when he looked into his father’s eyes, for the first time in his life, he saw a bold, confident 65-year-old man who was at peace inside, rather than the scared, angry little boy. 

The supernatural healing that took place that day in Luis’s heart was so profound that two weeks later his wife, Pablo’s mother, cancelled the divorce and moved back home. She said, “I don’t know what happened to my husband, but finally I got back the man I thought I married forty-five years ago. For the last forty-five years I have been trying to follow an angry little boy, who doesn’t know where he is going, and who was frequently blaming me for many of his own failures and frustrations. Somehow, now the fear, anger, frustration, and blame are all gone. This is the man I fell in love with forty-five years ago. I don’t want to divorce him. I love him and want to live the rest of my life with him.” 

Luis and his wife spent the next several months living in a honeymoon. They spent many more years prospering in business and devoting much of their time to ministering to and helping other couples through a marriage ministry in their city. Luis later told Pablo, “I had no idea that the blessing of my father is what my heart had been longing for, for over fifty years. I knew it would be good to see my father, but I had no idea that his blessing would be such a key to change my image and experience of myself and of life.”

Grandpa later told Pablo, “If I had known that my blessing as a father was the key that would unlock future prosperity to my son, I would have used it many decades ago. I only regret that I made this discovery so late in my son’s life, and that it took my grandson to motivate me to do what I should have done as a father many decades ago.”